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Friday, July 28, 2006

Microsoft Gulp?

MS Cola FAQ (Score:5, Funny)

by servognome (738846) Alter Relationship on 5:36 Saturday 29 July 2006 (#15803078)

Why doesn't my cola can open?
MS cans are complex devices. While they are engineered to world class specifications and thoroughly tested, it cannot be guaranteed that it will function in all conditions. Please take the following steps before contacting customer service:
Ensure you have the can oriented correctly
Ensure you are lifing the tab - This is located at the top of the can
Ensure sufficient force is being applied to lift the tab - Check finger for any breaks, muscle tears, or other abnormalities which may cause insufficient force to be applied

Why must I agree to a EULA before opening my drink?
EULAs are standard throughout the beverage industry. They are designed to clearly communicate your rights, as well as the rights and limitations of Microsoft, its partners, and subsidiaries.

My drink is coming out of holes in the can other than the one for drinking
This is a known issue. Please apply the latest security patches to address this issue

MS Cola went up my nose when I was laughing, and it hurts
Microsoft is not responsible and does not support such use of soda as outlined in the EULA. For information on development of undocumented soda use please navigate to the developer forum: microsoft.com/MCola/developer/forum.htm

I purchased a 12 pack, can my kids drink some of the soda?
Sharing is prohibited for the standard home edition of MS Cola. Multi-user packs are available for purchase as a seperate product.

How can I beta test Crystal Microsoft Cola?

Beta testing has not begun. You may subscribe to the CMC Newsletter for the latest information on this development product.

When will CMC be available
Crystal Microsoft Cola is scheduled to be part of the Vista launch event.
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