"while my good friend senator brown has presented himself to you as a family friendly candidate, i am only trying to help the american public understand him better if he were to be elected come december rather than myself, by bringing to light some grave AIM chat scripts from june 2006..."
"When i was 14 years old"
"now senator, you need to own up to what you say and do, take some personal responsibility, isn't that what you keep pressing as a message on your constituents?"
"moderator, i think that now would be a good time..."
"ehem, william brown: 'OMFG, look at this lolcat'"
"unidentified individual only known as counterstrike-masterstrafer03: 'wtf, "i are serious cat", omfg, lol'"
"william brown: 'you like pussy cats?'"
"counterstrike-masterstrafer03: 'i like the cock fights, if you know what i mean, lol'"
"moderator i must insist at the totally inappropriate..."
"william brown: 'a/s/l?'"
"alright, if my opponent insists on this kind of personal negativity i am only compelled to bring to the attention of the american public a log of eMule downloads for a certain ip address of 18.104.22.168 in april of 2002, does that ip sound familiar mr. gordon?"
"how dare you"
"ehem, 'bangbus 25: lisa and raoul'"
"'spanking nannies 3, the return of mistress oblivion'"